Friday, May 14, 2010

A painful lesson in Product Branding

We'll start with the facts.
A father was arrested for actually "branding" his children.  And it sounds like he didn't have to hogtie the kids the way they do cattle.  According to the Associated Press, a 39-year-old genius dad from Washington state was behind this bizarre family bonding exercise.  And for his efforts genius dad was charged with second-degree assault.  And the punchline, Wait- for- it--   A jury acquitted him!  Badda Boom.

The aforementioned genius father told the jury his kids WANTED to be branded like baby cows.  This included two teenage sons and an 18-year-old daughter.   No charges were filed in connection with the daughter's branding because she's legally old enough to give her consent.

Genius dad testified that he was going through a divorce and wanted to do something to pull the family together.  What, they couldn't get together for pizza night?  Speaking of family- genius dad's ex-wife inspected her branded brood and pronounced herself "horrified".  Makes you wonder why she was getting divorced?


So, what kind of "brand" did they all go for?  A Nike swoosh?  The McDonald's arches? The NBC peacock?  Paris Hilton's phone number?  No.  They all got some kind of family logo burned into their skin.  Why couldn't they just get all liquored up together like other dysfunctional families?

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